January 28, 2010

I need New York more than ever today. New York is like blanket I run to when things get impossible or hopeless. Before 10am today, I was knocked to the ground verbally leaving me feeling hopeless and tired of fighting for something I only kind of want...basically just because the money is great. What kind of life is this?

I started reading Patti Smith's autobiography last night and she is my muse, my inspiration, and my model right now. Are lives are freaklishly parallel and I can't seem to stop thinking about the first 30 pages of the book. She knew she was an artist of some kind, knew she wasn't going to conform to societies standards of what is considered "right", and knew working at a text book factory was not where she belonged. In a nutshell, this is me.

So she went to New York City to seek refuge. No money, just signs to guide her. You know you belong elsewhere when sleeping on a stoop of a brownstone in New York City seems better than where you are now.

I need my blankie.